AND A 3D BY THOSE DAMN DUDDLEYS!!!

Damn. I was just about to reply the same thing. But instead of an emoji, I was going to say “Pick one!”

It’s 2025. I wish I could afford food…

The one time I went camping, it just felt like I was cosplaying as a homeless person.

Luckily no bears ate me.

I know the second cat. I mean, not the individual cat, but I know exactly what that cat is all about. If you try to pull your finger away, she will dig her claws in, and say “No. Your finger stays here. You don’t get to decide when you leave. I decide. Now stay just where you are.”

…I’m stealing this. I’m going to pitch this to cartoon network. The capy would have this real slow deep voice, and not get excited about anything, but he’s always just chill and happy to be there.

And the meerkat would basically be this coke riddled hyperactive spazzo.

Is it bad that I want to cast Dan “Dan” Avidan as the Capybara, and Arin Hanson as the Meerkat?

The show could be called “Spooples and friends”. None of the characters are named “Spooples”, and we never explain the name of the show.

Well now I want a meerkat and a capybara!

Best I can do is $3.50.

Guys! It’s not NSFW because she said fuck. It’s NSFW because the bird is a tit.

who’s going to serve the middle and the bottom income levels?

And laughter ensued from the 1%

I basically go to the gym and try to kick my own ass. Some days it’s all cardio. Some days its all arms. Some days its all legs. Some days it’s a mix.

I don’t even know the names of the machines. One of them you do a jogging moonwalk. I do that for 15 minutes. Some days I do an exercise bike. They also have this machine where you pull a stick as you sit down, and the whole seat moves backwards.

Then there’s this thing that has 2 handles, and the handles are connected to weights which are connected to a steel cable wire. As you push the handles forward you are pushing the steel cable, which in turn lifts the weights which are on the side.On that one I do 20 reps at 55lbs. But some days my arms are too tired, so I bump down to 40lbs.

They also have a ab machine. Turns out I was doing it wrong. You put your knees on this padded seat, and then your elbows in the arm rests on the top with handles. I thought you were supposed to lift with your knees but stablize the left with your arms. Then I saw on the machine NOT to use your arms.

So…whoops.

…you’re just confusing me more.

I don’t know the gym terms. I don’t know what CV or HIIT are.

I’m just going to the gym, basically kicking my own ass every night, and then getting home, showering, going to bed, and weighing myself in the morning. The needle is moving in the right direction. At my heaviest I was 315. I’ve been dieting for like 2 years, but a month ago I started going to the gym.

Since I started going to the gym, I went from 259, to today 247. I think the cardio combined with my new diet is a good combo. I was 249 yesterday. Then I did like 35 minutes of cardio. Mixed in with arms, abs, and legs strength training.

Today I was 247.

I still don’t get what you mean about 7 days rest.

Dude…the line was crossed like 7 years ago when ICE agents just started raiding innocent peoples homes, and kidnapping them in unmarked vans.

THIS is so far past the line we csn’t even see the line. The line is a dot from here.

He looks like if one of the members of mudvayne got really into meth.

I don’t want to brag, but I once made it to level 12 in Tetris for gameboy, in a T.J Maxx in the 90s. I only lost because my mom said she was done shopping. But I had the perfect lighting spot and didn’t want to move. So I said “Just go back to shopping. You love shopping.”

And my mom took that personally.

My best ever tetris run may have gone on even further. I’ll never know where I’d have gotten. In the end, my run was ended by my mom dragging me out of the store by my ear.

Still though. Level 12.

This has all the makings of a romcom. One day you’ll meet a woman who has multiple cracked cups, but the lids are fine.

Good. Because this current administration isn’t going to use taxes to maintain them.

I’m gonna show her my O-Bahn face!

the tow truck thingy

Ah yes, the technical term.

There was a news article I read maybe a decade ago. I’m probably forgetting a few details, but heres the jist:

Down in Florida there was a closed beach. The beach was open certain months, but this was not that month.

The reason the beach was closed was because inside the little pond/swamp/finger lake were alligators in mating season.

This beach also had fences blocking access. Meaning even to get on the beach you had to jump a fence that was covered in warning signs.

So this dumbass shows up to the beach, puts his towel down by the water, and is just about to get in the water.

Cop pulls up on the other side of the fence, and starts yelling they need to get out of there, that they are in danger.

Guy ignores him and starts walking towards the water. Cop is yelling the water is filled with alligators, and it’s 6pm, so it’s feeding hour. He is in danger even being on the beach at all, but going in the water is certain death.

Guy gets in the water while yelling “FUCK THE ALLIGATORS!”

No sooner had he yelled that when his body was ripped violently underwater. Blood filled the water, and a feeding frenzy had ensued. His body ripped to shreds while his family, still on the beach cried on for the cop to do something. The cops simply told them “there is zero chance I am crossing this fence. If you were smart, you wouldn’t be on that side either.”

Was that you? Did you once get ripped to shreds by alligators because you made plans to go to the beach?