It’s important to dispose of old potatoes from your pantry before they start withering and sprouting those gross roots.

No, she died in a creek.

If your platform is just shitting on the platform of others, you don’t have a platform

Greens: “sane policies, sensible expectations”

The blue parties: “this is worse than Stalinism acktually”

Kinky

If they don’t have water slides in heaven, it’s not heaven.

Everything reminds me of him 😞

If your iceberg lasts more than 3 days, consult a physician

Let him find out the hard way that the demons won

Can’t believe you’d say it out loud, with a hard ‘R’ and all!

And Afghanistan

I do not want to go where there is no anaesthetic

She can fix me

I use a desk phone every day in my office.

Mood

You will regret it in 500 years though.

I only eat the crust.

Wow there’s no need to be rude

“What if Left, but worse and racist?”

Europa is too pure and regulated to be hegemony.

Do you think the US became a superpower by being kind and egalitarian and taking it slow? Nah, they came out the gate swinging, uppercut to Hiroshima and a roundhouse to Nagasaki, and it only got worse from there. They watched the old European powers withering under the weight of colonialism and insurrection in Indochina and southeast Asia and said “I’ll have a piece of that”.

You don’t become Hegemon by standardizing power grids and phasing out coal. You become Hegemon by selling your soul to the MIC, spinning up black site torture rooms in countries most people don’t even know the names of, funnelling guns and drugs to everyone who will take them, and bringing a fucking bandolier of hand grenades to every knife fight.